Playing the Game: Going Ghost!

Kianna Znika and Bianca Hull

So you thought things were going well with your boo until they decided to go Danny Phantom on you?

As embarrassing as it may be for some to say out loud, a majority of us in the dating world are quite familiar with “ghosting,” or the act of someone suddenly cutting themselves from your life without explanation.

Whether you were the one haunted or doing the haunting, it’s important to know that this phenomenon is anything but unnatural.

In fact, most of the time it’s expected. Acknowledging this is the first step towards a healthy, mature dating life.

Here’s the catch: Although many might not be ready to accept it yet, “ghosts” are not bad people. Ghosting, itself, does not automatically make someone terrible.

Many of us have done it, and have had it done to ourselves. At first, it might hurt. You might not know whether to be angry, sad, or even just slightly annoyed.

You might be quick to reach for your phone to get the closure that you’ve convinced yourself you “need.”

The truth is your feelings aren’t what’s hurt, your ego is. This is especially true with people you’ve only been speaking to for a short while.

In the world of dating, that individual has no obligation to continue talking to you.

The world of dating is meant for having fun, meeting new people, and deciding whether certain people may be worth a potential relationship. It is why apps like Tinder exist.

News flash: nobody on that app is matching with only one person and sticking with them.

If you’ve been ghosted, you’ve been rejected. There’s nothing more to it.

Being rejected sucks, but would you ever be mad at someone for telling you “It’s just not working?” No. You would just be hurt.

So why then label “ghosts” as terrible people? Are they inconsiderate? Yes. Are they immature beings who are afraid of confrontation? Probably.

Being an inconsiderate, immature individual in the dating world does not necessarily make you evil, though. They’re just living their own life, which means it is time for you to move on, and live yours.

Take the same advice that you’d give to your own friends in this situation, because you deserve the type of love you give to others. You deserve better.

A person exiting your life makes room for just that.

Forgive, because it will help you move on and be the bigger person. Don’t take it personally, because we’re all just trying to do what’s best for ourselves.

Some people enjoy the rush of chasing others, some are too afraid to commit, and some are too busy to invest their time in someone else. The reason itself does not matter.

Move on. It’ll take all the power away from them and bring it back to you.

It’s all a part of playing the game.