On my last visit to the “happiest place on earth”, I was shocked and annoyed to discover that in the Magic Kingdom, smoking is outlawed.

I found out the hard way when I lit one up right next to a no-smoking sign, seeing as I couldn’t seem to find a place to stand in without one.

A woman a few feet away gasped in horror. “Doesn’t he see the sign?!” she exclaimed loudly to her companions, causing me to blow a few puffs in her direction.

A few minutes later, Mickey’s Royal Guard showed up to inform me smoking is only permitted in the nearest designated smoking area, a 10 ft by 5 ft corral just under a mile away. The reason: the safety of everyone in the park.

I put out my butt, and the world was a safer place.

Before I arrived in the park, however, me and the other 5,000 people parked in “Donald Duck” spent half an hour in a giant enclosed cement building full of cars, machines with giant engines emitting toxins out their tailpipes potent enough to eat away the sky.

And everyone’s OK with this? My point is this: the world is full of real dangers, and we have chosen second-hand smoke as our cause of highest concern. I promise the smoke from my cigarette won’t kill you. Maybe me, but not you. If you’re really worried about your lungs, you’d steer clear of campfires, roads, and cities, for that matter.

But these sniveling rule-mongers would rather see a law passed that makes it illegal for me to smoke anywhere outdoors than to ask me to move or put it out if it’s honestly bothering you. There are even bills in the works to outlaw smoking in your own home, but more on that later.

Cigarettes can be a nuisance, but laws are not the answer. Simple etiquette can solve this one. Use your common sense to solve your second-hand smoke related dilemmas, not your congressmen.