Bullies are victims themselves

Abraham Venegas

Every time there is a suicide that is associated with “bullying,” the blame is solely on the bully, but never at a culture in need of change.

Even though bullying and suicide can be interconnected, other key factors like anxiety, depression and disconnection with the family should be evaluated.

It’s easy for schools to try to eliminate violence by singling out the person who bullies by labeling him/her as evil due to their bullying behavior.

Bullies might be victims themselves.

The act of bullying is an adaption due to a harsh environment and the feeling of powerlessness they are or have experienced as a child.

According to psychologist Albert Bandura’s Social Learning theory, individuals learn how to behave and intimate from other people.

If we can learn how to conduct ourselves in a respectful way toward other people, then logically violent tendencies can be learn and applied.

The fact is there are many factors that contribute for people to be bullies usually from a violent uprising.

Some kids are brought up in an authoritarian household which are either the parents, relative, or sibling who will physically and/or mentally abuse, as well as have final say in everything.

Kids that grow up in these harsh environmental conditions that involve being beaten will believe they deserve it which will cause them to be more accepting of violence.

Murray A. Straus, sociology professor at the University of New Hampshire, and his colleagues conducted national surveys on the effects of corporal punishment and verbal aggression on children.

They found that parents who frequently use corporal punishment and verbal aggression on children have a higher chance of becoming depressed, having suicidal thoughts, performing poorly at school, becoming juvenile delinquents, and having less control of their aggression.

Once the kids reach their teen years, they will have low self-esteem, will handle situations with violence or let themselves be victimized due to them having a difficult home environment.

People bully other people because its way to release stress, low self-esteem, and believing that is the social norm since they grew up with violence.

People who allow themselves to be victimized, feel shame and guilt, and won’t recognized & dismiss they have been harass or punished.

There are other factors media glorifying sex, hatred, and violence, American’s lust for guns, redemption and psychically disciplining their kids so it’s not a surprised that kids are vicious to one and other.

Anti-bullying legislature or zero tolerance for bullying at schools isn’t going to help stop bullying.

There is already too many laws as it is, having a crime and punishment law for bullying is just a turning a blind eye to the problem.

Positive method would be to work with the bully and his/her family to change the dynamics at home and how they communicate since violence is a behavior that is learn within families.

Another effective approach to bullying is to teach kids to treat everyone with respect, teach them values and manners, and empowering parents to alternate ways than “power over” methods on kids.

Most people see people who do commit suicide due to harassment as cowards, which is ignorant.

It will take a lot of torment for people to consider suicide to be the only escape route for their problems.

People would point that people who commit suicide aren’t mentality strong but not everybody has the same mentality.

Being self-confident in yourself isn’t something people are just born, it is built upon life experiences and being optimistic.

Another problem is that parents are telling their kids about the dangers of the internet where is most bullying has been happening these days and the world in general, not helping the kids build self-confidence & self-esteem and just being there for their kids.

In order to change bullies’ and victims’ way of thinking is to fix the cycle of violence they are born into.