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Bianca Bitches: Guide to a new you for the new year

Bianca Martinez, Editor-in-chief

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The time has come for me to bid you all adieu, for now, whether you adored my column, tolerated, loathed or happened to read it on Reddit.

But as they say, you can’t leave without having one more for the road, so here’s one more column of me giving you advice you didn’t ask for on a topic you didn’t get to pick.

As the new year approaches, and another anxiety-inducing family dinner to get through is just around the corner, here’s a survival guide on to not fall prey to the judgement of relatives, finding the new you and how to follow through on all those resolutions you make to no avail.

Step #1: Build up your self-confidence/esteem

Anxious about meeting up with relatives because you know there’s going to be an onslaught of back-handed compliments, judgmental remarks and intrusive questions.

You know the culprit, that one aunt that likes to pass her judgemental glare over everyone and tell them how they should live their lives, even though she is unemployed, has multiple health conditions, kids that have no manners and spews out more profanity than a well-seasoned sailor and I put together.

Well, no worries here because I’m going to teach you how to fend her off.

Negative comments have little to no effect if you don’t let them bother you so instead developing a “thicker skin,” try an approach that actually works, doesn’t excuse their actions and improves your self-esteem in the process.

You must develop a healthy mindset, don’t feel embarrassed to check out books or read articles on the subject and/or write yourself affirmations where you can see them.

According to an article by Teen Vogue, “Write down some of the talents, skills, successes, and other things you love about yourself and focus on those.”

Step #2: Find Spirituality

When I say, spirituality, I don’t mean Jesus, no matter how much your BFF claims you need him, but I mean spiritually in yourself. Have faith in yourself.

Put yourself on a pedestal for once, the grass is always greener on your side, you are too hot to handle, the world is your oyster!

Imagine all the positive things you are capable of, if you just believe in yourself.

Just think of how much lighter you would feel if you just lift the weight of all the self-doubt off your shoulders.

Push yourself to be the better version of you, because at the end of the day it’s you that’s going to get you to where you need to be, nobody else is.

Step #3: Implement your personal bill of rights

Don’t want to go to the relatives for the holidays because it incites uncomfortable situations, memories and stuff you just don’t want to deal with, because it affects you emotionally in a negative way?

Then don’t, it’s just that simple.

You are not obligated to put yourself in a situation that you don’t want to be in.

You have the right to be happy, and you especially have the right to make decisions that benefit you and put yourself first.

Stop pleasing others and please yourself first, just because it’s the holiday doesn’t mean you have to visit garbage people, even if they are related to you.

Step #4: Don’t forget to self-care!

With all the hustle and bustle and stress that comes with the holiday season, don’t forget to make time and “treat yo self!”

You shouldn’t feel guilty for splurging once a month or a while, think of it as an investment, you are investing in your well-being.

However, if you are not much of a “Parks and Recreation,” fan, you can just unwind by doing the things that helps you unwind and clear your mind so you can release the tension of the day.

Step #5: Dress to impress…Yourself

It’s New Year’s Day and you have found yourself sucked into making a resolution and you have chosen putting more effort into your appearance.

You know the cliche, when you look good, you feel good.

Now it may not be true for all, especially the sweatpants, socks with slides crowd, but a favorite outfit or wearing a power color can help you put out a kick-ass vibe.

According to a Vogue article, “It’s no secret that assembling an outfit is like selecting social armor, and that what we wear has power over others, but this study shows if you have a strong cultural association with a garment, wearing it can affect your cognitive processes.”

Good power colors are red, royal blue and emerald green, or you can wear a color that coordinates with your zodiac sign.

Now I’m not saying buy designer, not all, nor am I saying that have to wear heels or a suit, but sometimes attention to detail in your appearance can add an extra pep in your step when you need it.

Step #6: Don’t be afraid to tell people to take a flying leap up their own ass

Want to unlock the new you?

Cut off toxic-ass people.

You’d be surprised how much a person’s negative energy can bring you down and affect your disposition.

So if you have someone in your life that brings out the worst in you, has forced you to change for their advantage and are, overall, controlling and possessive, cut that tumor off and get on the road to emotional recovery and regain the you that was buried.

These are only a couple of generic steps you can take to achieve a new you, only you really know what needs to be improved in your life, and my suggestion is to make the changes that best benefit you in the most healthy way.

Sure, the holidays can be garbage but you can combat them by focusing on yourself and improving your wellbeing for the better.

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Cerritos College • Norwalk, Calif.
Bianca Bitches: Guide to a new you for the new year