The Envelope: Online Etiquette (for Dummies)

Benjamin Garcia

I may be a dirty, disgusting communist, but I know a thing or two about refinement– especially online refinement.

For example, you will look like a cretin if you creep onto someone’s Facebook wall and try to start a cussing match– especially if the recipient party does not reciprocate or respond.

Everyone will think you are simple if you show that your vocabulary is thinner than a meth head’s waist; and it would be downright troglodytic to lack the awareness of who you are talking to.

When you say something like “it’s easier for us to break the rules, than change them– so we will just break them; and you, the students’ watchdogs, should just mind your own business.” THIS IS OUR BUSINESS.

What do we have to do, get a dreamer as Editor-In-Chief?

It should be obvious that etiquette should not be suspended when you pick up you computer or mobile device. At the rate we are propelling ourselves into a world of online mass communication, and if manners matter– online manners matter especially.

For this reason, I have compiled some tips and tricks for conducting your online communication in a pragmatic and graceful way.

You must understand that you are talking to people; I know this a novel concept; it’s easy to forget that it’s quite unlikely that the person you are calling a “cuck” is not a kitten walking across a keyboard.

All other rules of online etiquette are contained in this: If using empathy and goodwill, you can do no wrong.

Arguing with another person on the internet is rather ungraceful behavior. It is right to be embarrassed if you have done this in the past.

What purpose does arguing with a stranger serve? Why do you care so much about what they think? Why should you be the one to “educate” them?

It is never acceptable to start a fight with someone on social media; no matter what sort of ideology you are contesting.

However, if someone @ you on Twitter and criticizes something petty and not worth the time it would take to refute, remember: Kindness in power will topple every tower.

The most diplomatic way to deal with unwanted critique from strangers is to respond in kind or change the subject.

If you are otherwise being questioned on the basis of a belief, engage in discussion in a respectful way.

The internet was created to bring the world together. Creating and maintaining harmony is your goal.